while i still care

I came early at the office this morning with the hope of having a good day this time around. My day started out just fine. Just a few numbers of claims to do, I was able to finish my work before system downtime. I checked on my mails, I've got the usual mails from yahoo groups and stuffs and few messages from some friends. We had our lunch at McDonald's. We saw STAR team wave 2 there. Me and my teammates from PG-IMAGE weren't able to join others in playing bingo because we had a talk with our two supervisors. Everything had gone well not until he told me that he got a sms from her telling him that she'll be coming to the office. That means that he can't be with me. I was saddened by the fact that there's nothing I can do but to come home alone. I didn't say a word after he told me that. He asked if I was angry, I said I am not which is true. Hours later, I just found out that he had left office without minding to bid me goodbye. I was hurt for that simple reason. So instead of coming home early, I phoned my mom and told her that I'll be coming home late.

I spent time with my friends. We went to Robinson's Galleria and had our dinner there then to Shangri-La and then to Metrowalk. It was tiring yet fun. But all that time, my mind was busy thinking of him. I was still hurt. I stayed out late because I don't want to come home and get myself with the thoughts of him. While we were at Metrowalk, he sent me a sms - "I love you" he said. I wanted to cry my heart out as I read that message. He keeps on telling me that he loves me, but he keeps on hurting me as well. I am not certain if he knew it but yes, he hurt me. He hurt me a lot of times. I actually had enough and yet I am not mad at him even a bit. I can't, simply because I love him. You may call me stupid, but that's me. I don't get mad at someone I love. So it would be very rarely that I will get mad at him. But it doesn't mean that I will not get tired of all the pains and sleepless nights. I just pray that He will answer my prayers while I still care.